Finding myself back to some old ‘hot points’ while hearing myself label my food/exercise/nourishment choices with words such as “good” or “bad.” Things like, “I did really good today,” or “yesterday was a bad day” in terms of nourishing myself. What is this about? Since when is nourishing my mind/emotions/spirit by surrendering to a “craving” or habit a “bad” thing?” And why is it a bad thing? And why is it “good” when I have an easy day and my nutrition, etc, is right on track?
I do my best every day. I am, in each moment, an expression of all that has led me to where I am in THAT moment. I’d say it’s FANTASTIC that I’m alive and here to tell about it! Who says chocolate cake is “bad?” That’s ridiculous! I have had chocolate cake in celebration of weddings, birthdays, celebrations of life, baby showers, during conversations with girlfriends when a break-up has happened accompanied by tears and ending in closeness and laughter… chocolate cake is not bad. It’s fabulous!! So what is “bad,” then, when I choose foods that I don’t find nutritious? Is it me that I am labelling as bad? Certainly not! (see above, 2nd sentence, this paragraph:-)
How about “good?” Why, when I am able to honor the boundaries I have set for myself around food, is that a “good” day? Maybe I should say “it was an easy day.” That might be more impeccable, honestly. What about when a day is challenging and I am able to honor my structure around food, nourish myself with ease and delight? Is that good? Or is that just the way it is on that day? I think my point is, that it is what it is. Labelling behavior for me is not healthy. If it’s “good,” then my immature self wants a reward! If it’s “bad,” then that leads to punishment, self sabotage, etc, and probably falling farther off the wagon than I would have.
Let’s say a day is challenging, I do not honor the structure around what I eat, and I “give in” to cravings/impulses/etc..? Is that really all that “bad?” I think not. I think, when that happens, I am nourishing me on some level. Maybe mental, relieving the stress around whatever the issue is with an old friend: food. Maybe the stress of NOT eating whatever it is is more UNhealthy mentally and spiritually than eliminating the stress of the issue at hand, dealing with what needs my attention in the moment, and moving on.
My goal is to nourish myself, body, mind, and spirit. I am multi-dimensional. There are layers to me. I am doing my best. I want to honor that no matter what my choices look like on the outside. I don’t know about you, but beating myself up for anything has never served me well……
Watermelon, anyone?
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