The Voices in Our Head

“You’re never going to have a flat stomach.”

“You should aim for a size 8 instead of the 6 you used to be or the 4 you want to be… just to be safe”

“You thighs will always be too big”

“Even if you got down to a size TWO you’re going to have excess skin and stretchmarks. Is it really worth it!?”

Now for the record I have no desire to be a size 2. I’m 5′9″ and a 2 would be very unhealthy on me. I was a 4 once in my life… it was the one time that I was confident about my body in a swimsuit… it was also the time when my boyfriend (now husband) and I were broken up and my overly emotional state sent my metabolism into overdrive. I was definitely still eating… but I was little! Anyway, I digress… we all have little voices in our head telling us what’s wrong with our bodies and how we’re not going to reach our goals. For as long as I can remember - size 4 break-up body aside - I have been discontent with the way I looked. Here I sit… a size 12 and I would kill to be a size 6 but even at a 6 I was discontent.

Today I want to say something to all of you out there size 6 to size 60 -

How often do we walk around unhappy about something and do nothing about it?!

I wish I could spout a magical formula of how to go from wanting something to actively accomplishing something. All I can say is it’s a personal decision… a realization even that no one is going to do this but you. We live in a society that throws lies about weight loss in our face all day long. Do I wish that eating a berry would magically make me thin - yes! Is it going to happen? Not really. Sure a few pounds might come off but then there’s maintenance and if you have more than “a few pounds to lose” something more dramatic is required. Deep down inside you and I both know one irrefutable fact - the way to lose weight is to consume less calories and burn off more energy. DIET AND EXERCISE. Fads come and go but diet and exercise will always be the answer. It’s a long hard journey…. trust me I know.

Yesterday I had another migraine - my fifth one this week… not fun. Eating helps the migraines but it doesn’t help my goal. So there I was, on the kitchen floor, tears in my eyes, counting out the baked lays I had to stuff in my mouth to help steady my head. A little insane? Most certainly!! Am I laughing about it today? Definitely!! What a sad, stereotypical dieter I was!! But my point is this: I can’t let anything get in my way on this journey!! In case you’re wondering, after a good nap (during the kiddo’s nap) and a few hours the headache passed. I wasn’t able to do a full run due to the toddler’s schedule, but I did get in 2 miles in 20 minutes. No matter what life throws at you, no matter how bad it gets, if you have a goal and determination you can make it happen.

No more pity parties!! No more negative voices!! If I don’t like something I’m going to do something about it! I have the power to change. It may be a slow and painful process at times, but I have the power to change!