I don’t feel good. Tired. Fuzzy headed. Tummy hurts. What a crappy yesterday was (and what a crappy way I responded). I created a new page, My Vocation, describing my work. Yesterday, I wrote that I was pouring all my energy into my job and my children giving little or nothing to my wife. In my About Me page and my original post, Day Zero, which listed my goals I said “I want to be nicer to everyone - especially my wife” among other things. I’m really dropping the ball with that goal to say the least.
If the kids at work, my fellow staff, and the friends who think I’m noble and saintly for working there saw the disgraceful way I behaved yesterday I would lose credibility with all of them. Yesterday and at other times, I’ve said I give a lot to my children but when they watch the anger and cruelty, living in this negativity and tension … I’m not being the good father I like to think I am.
I like to think I try really hard but I’ve simply got to try harder … no, no … a wise man once said, “Do or do not. There is no try.”
DAY 27 DIARY:
Breakfast: Assorted sliced fruit.
Lunch: xxx
Soda Pop: none.
Coffee: none.
Alcohol: none.
Dinner: xxx.
Snacks: xxx
Exercise: xxx
Weight: xxx lbs.
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